A Letter To My Son

**Recently, a friend of mine wrote a letter to her unborn daughter and posted it to her own blog. Reading that letter made me extremely emotional but it was soo good, and it made me realize there are many things I want to tell my own son so she inspired me to write a letter of my own.**

(Her post is here: http://againsttheordinary.blogspot.com/p/a-letter-to-my-daughter.html)

To My Son:

My dear, sweet, little Levi. First off, I want you to know that I love you sooo much! I know you’ve heard it before and you’ll it every day for the rest of your life but that’s only because it’s true.

In fact, from the moment that second little line turned blue I was in love. A little scared, yes, but completely, whole-heartedly in love. And I promise that will never, ever change. I’m going to be honest with you for a moment, you were a bit of a surprise. Your father and I had initially planned to wait awhile longer before we started having kids. But God had a much different plan for our lives. One we could never have dreamed up for ourselves. So I want you to know that even though you were a surprise that you are not an accident, not a mistake and not unwanted.

Honestly, it was quite the opposite. I knew even when I was young that I wanted to be a mom. I knew that God had laid this calling on my heart long before you were ever born, before I learned I was pregnant, before I’d even met your father. Before all of that I wanted you. I prayed for you. I loved you. And I hadn’t even met you yet. But my heart longed for the day I would. And the day you were born I knew my life had changed forever, and it would never be the same.

From pretty much day one you gave me trouble. You made me sick and tired. You gave me aches and pains. You sent me into preterm labor. Twice. And don’t even get me started on childbirth. And yet, somehow, after all of that, when you were finally born and I heard you cry for the first time and they placed you on my chest, I knew I would do it a million times over for you because you were worth every bit of struggle I went through. You are worth it. I hope you never forget that.

And I hope you never forget just how worthy you are, not only to me, but to your heavenly father as well. Because, though impossible it seems, he loves you so much more than I do, than I ever could. He loves you so much that he gave his ONLY son for you. He died for you. And I pray you never forget that.

It’s sort of funny because before we had learned whether you were a girl or boy I thought for sure you were a girl. (Please don’t hold that against me!) Interestingly enough, I thought our friends, who were also pregnant at the time, were having a boy. Evidently, I got it completely backwards. (I guess I just don’t have the gift)

Even though I had initially thought you were a girl, when we learned that you were in fact a baby boy I was so happy, albeit a little nervous, but so so happy!

And I’ve come to realize something, that I’ve been given the unique opportunity to raise not just a boy but a young man.

Levi, I said earlier that I prayed for you long before you were ever born but I want you to know that I continue to pray for you everyday. I pray that your father and I will raise you to be a Godly man, something our society is in short supply of these days.

My hope is that you will be a man who continually strives after God’s own heart, day after day. I pray you will be a REAL man in a world full of overgrown boys. I pray you will be hope for the hurting and a light in the darkness.

And although you are a little boy now, I know the day will come when girls will go from having “cooties” to being cuties. (I know, cheesy, but I couldn’t resist) And you will begin to take notice. And to be honest that day scares me.

Sadly, we live in such a perverted, sexualized culture intent on dragging good men down. And though I am obviously not a man myself I know the temptation will be beyond belief. They will come at you with porn, with sexualized movies and ads, with the notion that all of this “stuff” is completely normal. Please believe me when I say, it’s not.

And I pray you know that. I pray you will be a man who goes against the grain, who challenges this depraved mentality. I pray you will be a man who treats women with the respect they deserve - no matter who they are or what they wear. I hope you learn to rise above that.

Our culture so often sees men as animals who only want one thing and can’t control their “urges”. But I pray that you will raise the standards for men in your generation, that you prove to them that not all men are dogs, that they’re not only after one thing, and that gentlemen DO exist and you are one of them. Not only that, but I pray you show women that THEY are worthy of a man who treats them well like you do.

I pray you will learn the value of hard work; that you always strive to do your best day in and day out; that when teachers and friends and employers look at you, they see someone responsible and capable and hardworking.

When I think of the man you will become someday the word that comes to mind is courage. I pray that you will be courageous in the face of fear, that you will be a man who stands up for what is right, even if the world is standing against you.

I pray you learn that,

Being brave is not about being fearless, but having the courage to do what scares you the most.

Levi, I hope you know that your father and I will always support you, no matter what direction you choose to go with your life. Your dad and I will always be your biggest fans. I do hope however, that you choose to follow wherever God leads you, whether that is to become a missionary in Nicaragua or to be a high school math teacher. (Just so you know, if you do become a math teacher there’s a good chance I will not be able to help you beyond basic algebra) I simply pray you have the continual courage to go after your dreams no matter how much they may scare you.

And I know, as much as I don’t want to think about it, that someday you will be all grown up. You may go to college and get married and have kids of your own. And although watching you learn and grow is such a joy and a privilege I know that day will come faster than I think and as I’ve said before I know I will miss the days when you were just a little boy in my arms. But to watch you go from a little boy to a young man is an incredible responsibility and nothing could make me happier.

So I have one last prayer for you. (Although not really) I pray that you will be a reflection of Jesus Christ. That you will be a man who fights for his family, his wife, his friends and his God. That you would be a witness every single day to those around you and realize that God has placed you when and where you are for a divine purpose. Because you are beautifully and wonderfully made. I know God has an amazing plan for your life and I hope you never forget who you are, but most of all, WHOSE you are.

Once again, I love you so much. Nothing you ever do will change that.

Love, Mommy